Thursday, December 3, 2009

On Learning My Husband

I like being married. To the Bubba, I mean. I don't think I would like being married to anyone else. My favorite part is that I get to know him better every day. Even after almost 5 years of being married.

My Bubba is the most sensitive person I know. And by sensitive, I mean mostly sensitive to criticism. We were in line at the grocery store the other day for milk and bread, and we were doing the self-checkout thang when the Bubba pushed a wrong button or some such thing and the computer announced that the attendant would be coming over shortly to help. He started pushing buttons and dropping the f-bomb. I could not for the life of me figure out why he was so upset. And here, I got all sad and fix-it-y because I thought it was something I did/said/didn't do/etc. Finally in the parking lot, he admitted that he didn't like that the computer announced to everyone that he did something wrong.

Which brings me to number two: the Bubba HATES BEING WRONG. So much so that this morning when Lucy got up at 5:30 and the Bubba rocked her for a while and brought her to bed with us where she thrashed around and talked about the poster on the wall and the numbers on the clock, I told him to put her back to bed. He said "It won't work." I said "Yes it will! Put her down and she'll cry for two seconds and then sleep all morning." After a few moments of silence so pure that I could almost hear the deep breathing from the next room, the Bubba came back in the bedroom to get dressed for work.
I asked "Did it work?"
He said "I don't know, Liz (Liz = his name for me when he's frustrated/exasperated/angry - otherwise it's Lizzie)." (I should probably add in fairness that a big part of this frustration that he's showing was from Lucy just being awake and needing attention at 5:30 AM and then deciding he might as well go in to work, ugh.)
"Well, did she go to sleep?"

Which brings me to number three: the Bubba HATES BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO. Last week I came home from the grocery store right around bedtime. I put the groceries in the middle of the kitchen floor and then Lucy asked for me to rock/sing songs with her. I mentioned to the Bubba that he didn't have to put anything away, that he could leave it for me, except that there's ice cream in that bag there and did he mind putting it in the freezer. After singing songs and rocking, and finally putting the Birdie to bed, I went back out in the kitchen. The Bubba had put everything away! EXCEPT! the bag containing ONLY ice cream still lying in the middle of the floor! And the Bubba was rinsing out a glass or some such thing in the sink obviously on to something else. He swears he didn't do it on purpose, and we had a good laugh ...

Which brings me to number four: Bubba is really good at leaving me clues NOT ON PURPOSE. Either that or I'm REALLY GOOD at reading into things. This morning I got up and the first thing I do before making coffee or going to the bathroom or anything is check my email and my iCal to see what's going on today. Well, this morning I got to my computer here, and lo! This is what greeted me: A NY Times article on how to improve your marriage! Coincidence? Maybe....

I love that each day I never know what I'm going to learn about/from the Bubba. This is what makes marriage so much fun.


Amy --- Just A Titch said...

I HATE when those computers announce I screwed up and the attendant comes over to chastize me. I feel stupid.

I love that you and A are continuing to learn about one another---that's great! Love you.

Carrie said...

Married life is never dull, is it :) Looking forward to seeing you guys soon. Ethan's been asking about "woosy".

barbetti said...

It's funny, the things you learn through marriage. I feel like Stephen and I are STILL growing up and still figuring out who we are as individuals.

Annie said...

I totally know what you mean about loving being married to YOUR husband. Same here...well, to MY husband. When I look at my girlfriends and the awesome guys they've been blessed to marry, I thank God for those men who've been so wonderful for my friends and have been such good friends to me, by extension. And then I thank God that I'm not married to any of I'm sure they do when they think of me & Tim. My mother-in-law always says "God has a plan..." and boy does he - especially when it comes to who he plans for us!