Me: Could I speak with the person in charge of hiring?
Lady: ... Hiring? ...
Me: (a little unsettled) I'm calling to inquire about any positions that may be open this summer.
Lady: (long pause) ... Positions? ...
I'm starting to wonder if I am indeed speaking English. Um, I think I am. Let's try again shall we?
Me: I'd like to know if you have positions opening in the summer. I'm looking for jobs for students.
Lady: ... I'm sorry .... ????
Ok. Deep breath. One more try.
Me: Um, what kind of business do you have?
Lady: Oh, I do psychic readings and home cleansings!
AH. I get it! Cleansings! Not a janitorial job for sure. Also? How well do you read people, lady? It took eleventy thousand years of uncomfortable pauses for ME to get us to ground we could both stand on.
Me: Oh, well, I guess I can't help you. I don't think any of my students have "the gift".