Monday, January 5, 2009

Promises, Promises...

I was sitting here wondering what I’m hungry for this week so I can make a list and go to the grocery store. And of course I’m doing this while watching Tyler Florence on the Food Network. I love him. I think I would love every single thing that he makes. And sometimes I convince myself that I have nothing better to do with my days than hang out in my kitchen and of course! I can make that super-duper labor intensive mediocre-looking meal!  Then I either get frustrated and sad that I’m actually a mom with things that I need to do and a crying baby that interrupts me or the fresh ingredients rot in their bags in my fridge before they become the masterpiece envisioned.

One of those infomercials came on for this fancy-pants peeler. You can use it either way! You can peel a two-by-four with it and then peel a tomato! It comes with a stand so now it’s a mandolin! And now put this attachment on and you make perfect julianned vegetables!

I want one of those infomercials to promise things like: Put on the hose attachment and BAM! your dishes are done! BUT WAIT! That’s not all! We will include a sous-chef that you can choose from a collection of online photos and profiles!  BUT WAIT! That’s not all! We will come to your town and find friends for you who will LOVE the way you julianne your vegetables and tell you how pretty you look while you do it!

Then I’d buy that shit for sure.

3 comments:

Carrie said...

I have to say, cooking is the one area of motherhood where I don't worry too much. I'm such a terrible cook that I consider our meals a success if everyone makes it through the day without being overly hungry or coming down with food poisoning.

Speaking of food, I think I'm going to go eat my third 100 calorie pack of Chocolate Caramel Chex Mix of the morning. Totally defeating the whole "100 calorie" thing. Oh well.

Nessa said...

I would be your friend if I lived in your area! And I wouldn't care what your julienne veggies looked liked.

Thanks for the prayers, we will absolutley need them. I'll post ultrasound pics on Thursday.

Kate P said...

I can relate to having had ingredients rot before I can get to cook ("not tonight, not tonight, not tonight. . . whoops"). Now, if a single version of Jamie Oliver could come over to my kitchen, that would be O.K. with me!