Friday, July 4, 2008

Safety first

The Bubba and I went to an infant CPR and safety class the other night.  It was a three hour class from 6-9 in the evening.  Needless to say, we were not in our paying-attention prime, but the class was ok.  Actually, I'm so emotional, it was pretty hard to learn how to do CPR on a baby doll without bawling, but I survived.

The second part of the class was basic safety for infants: don't let them play with marbles, etc.  But also, consumer products not safe for baby.  Like snugglies that fit behind baby in the car seat or the infant positioners in the crib so that baby doesn't roll over.  Some stuff we didn't know.  Some stuff we decided not to be overly paranoid about - like about crib bumpers.  Our instructor stressed was how unsafe crib bumpers are.  Now this kind of ticked Bubba and I off - not because they're unsafe, but because we already bought one.

So we decided to think of creative uses for this crib bumper that doesn't involve the crib:

You could make a TOGA and address the senate!

You could artfully wrap your nether-regions and hope 
the other Sumo wrestlers don't squash you!

You could use it as your sash and wave to your
adoring crowd as you accept your Miss America crown!

You can keep the heat off your head in hot desert climates!

You could join Pancho Villa and his bandits with your new bandolera!

These crib-bumper makers were genius!


Kate P said...

I am dying of laughter at your creativity!

Elizabeth said...

Honestly, I think our little one would be in more danger without the bumper. She uses it as her guide to where she should stop rolling. We took it out one night and she woke up screaming because she had her foot tangled in the slats.