It's good, but terrifying at the same time. I am so excited when I send an email to a company saying "work with me, I'm awesome!" and then I get scared because what if they don't want to work with me. Or worse - what if they DO? Then what?
So far, I am in contact with a couple of people who might want to work with us in different capacities, and I know where I want to go with them, I mean I know where I want them to take me and vice versa, but I'm having a hard time seeing the trees for the forest. I have to remind myself to be patient and just answer this question and then move on to the next.
This business thing? I'm learning a whole lot about what I need to do to make this work, but I think even more, I'm learning so much about myself and how *I* work. I had no idea I was so anal about EVERYTHING or that I would feel completely inadequate and lay awake nights if I didn't have a thoughtfully worded response to every question that comes up. The perfectionism!! The insecurity!!
Some of this might be pregnancy hormones and the "taking everything personally" part entirety of my brain. I'd like to think that in a couple months when I'm back at this after the baby that I'll be able to be a little more laid back and trust that people are people and stop being scared of their reactions to me.
I'm so excited about this company and its potential. I'm thrilled with the prospects of its future and my role in it. I just have to get through the setting-up and how-do-you-do stages. The ambiguity might kill me.